I'm Jealous Of A Dog And A Toddler

Today I put Brooke down for a nap at 1, and at 4 she started stirring around. At 4:30 now, she is still fighting being awake. She has his some sort of mental snooze button at least 5 times now as she wiggles around in her crib and resituates herself over and over. The dog has taken to napping during Brookes nap, and I totally get why. Brooke harasses her all day - this morning she threw a plastic bucket and a shoe at the dogs head, in addition to pulling her tail and yelling in her face. The dog is exhausted and takes advantage of the down time during Brookes naps to recharge. As I walk towards the stairs to bring Brooke up, the dog jumps on the couch ... and she doesnt get up until Brooke returns.

So today both the dog and the toddler took a 3+ hour nap. During that time I: made Brooke a hair appointment, scheduled a repair person, made/ate lunch, began making dinner, did some work on my dissertation, a load of laundry and a load of dishes, and now some blogging. I would have preferred the nap.

I told myself I was going to run tonight and now I am changing my mind. I havent been running since 1/31 and am avoiding it. I think partly because of my bad 1/2 Marathon experience and partly because I just like having the break. While I have admitted I need a race out there to encourage me to run/train, I also feel a little stressed having to fit running into my life.

And I want to be clear - my life isnt all that hard. Its a pretty great life actually. And in parts, I'm really good at it. I think I'm a good mom, a good friend, a good wife, a good student, a good runner. But I'm having trouble wearing the mom-friend-wife-student-runner hats all at the same time :) Sometimes I like the opportunity to drop one of my titles and take a bit of a rest. And, its pretty hard to drop the "mom", "wife" or "friend" title. Occasionally I slack in the "student" part - but with a dissertation advisor breathing down my neck that title has recently been the one I most often associate with. Unfortunately for "runner", it always comes at the bottom of the list. But fortunately, I like my runner hat. Sometimes it gets dusty, but I always put it back on. And luckily I have a tentative running date scheduled for this weekend. I know once I get back out there I will happily train for my next race (3/21), but until then I might just let that hat gather a bit more dust ...